I used to think of self care as something for wimpy people and workaholics. Like an excuse to be lazy or to refresh or reboot. Even a year ago, self care just seemed like a maintenance system to keep my cup full. A way to be more intentional about my commitments, to avoid burnout and emotional roller coasting.

From Best to Broken


Recently, with my attention on my 40 Day Practice: From Bias to Best, I uncovered what supports me being energized and fulfilled, happy and confident. Capable, contributing, and complete. I also saw what derails and drains me.

In honoring the distinct reminders to be with and experience the breadth of life I broke an old operating paradigm — of “being strong” — and created a new one. Somehow, I met my pain with love. I offered my best to myself.



Those not-so-great moments no longer blend into the background as I “do” life. I can surrender to them and just be with ALL of my experience: including the shame, disappointment, sadness, and anger.

I could call this self care, but I’m really talking about presence, as in being present with someone or something.

Distinctly Defined


Self care is a practice in being present. Being aware of your experience, yet not being your experience. Being the Observer of your experience, and offering yourself the necessary care, as you would to a friend. Observer as Source. It’s also a practice in being whole. It’s you offering your (human) self the grace of (You as) God. Divine communion.



Presence and wholeness…the self care foundation for intentional living, working, relating. The place from which we naturally own the responsibility for generating all of our life. The way to LIVE as a human being, noticing when we become a human doing.

What do you notice about how you think about, relate to, or do self-care?